Secret War

There's a secret war I'm fighting alone
No bullets expended or knives thrust
Nary an armored tank or jet plane involved
Some fought in the back alleys of my brain
Clandestine maneuvers and machinations
Only how I feel for you and miss you
The wounds are bittersweet
No bandage or quik clot has an effect
A medic would be useless and medicine
Ineffective as I struggle and hope to heal
I fight it within myself, I wage total war
With my own shattered heart and mind
Am I gaining ground? Has my plan survived
That inimitable first contact of battle?
I'll win as I know not another way but
At what cost victory against myself